Month: March 2019

Hello, Goodbye, Hello, Goodbye


I’m tired of changing therapists…Whether it is because a psychiatric or therapeutic student completed their residency or because they’re going on maternity leave, I can’t stand change. See, after months of adapting to my regular therapist, she left for maternity leave. Not that I’m not happy for her, I just dread starting ALL over again knowing a new therapist. Like it’s not bad enough I have generalized anxiety disorder. So here I was COMPLETELY get nervous about who and what the temporary therapist is like. Then after a few visits I get use to the temp therapist. Then one day… POOF! I hear the temp therapist left from the receptionist and my regular therapist returned from maternity leave and I will be meeting with her again the following week. Ugh!

Is it wrong to feel I liked my temp therapist more than my regular therapist? I felt like she gave me little things that I felt really helped me and she suggested an additional medication in addition to my current anti-depressant medication to help me better help me with my depression. Ugh! I feel so bad for dreading my old therapist! Adjusting is hard because my anxious self doesn’t like change. It prefers consistency and familiarity… especially when it’s helpful. She left just when she was going to work up a case plan for me. So now, I’m wondering what my therapy sessions are going to be like my former therapist. Oh boy… Anyways, I’m glad I saw her last week when I did. 🙂

R. Kelly, Part 6: Victim Shaming

Dr Luke’s Lawyer: “But again, there are people that are falsely accused of rape, aren’t there? You think there has never been a false accusation of rape?”

Lady Gaga: How about all of the women that are accused of being liars and how she was slut shamed in front of the world, how about that?

Lady Gaga fighting for Kesha against her former music producer Dr. LukeFrom the online article: How Can Sexual Abuse Survivors get Justice When the System fails them?


I don’t really get the whole thing about victim shaming. No…it’s not that I don’t know what it is, but rather..why does society blame the victim? Why does society seem to crucify the people who need the most help? The victims who presented themselves on the Lifetime show, “Surviving R. Kelly” and even on the Dateline Special, “R.Kelly: Accused” are viewed pretty much as TV whores….women who are vying for their 15 minutes of fame and to gain money. However, after even listening to clips of their stories, I believed them, especially when they talked how it affected their lives, because I know how my incident affected mine.

So in a definition context, what is victim shaming? According to Wikipedia (I just loved how they perfectly defined it), “Victim Shaming or victim blaming “occurs when the victim of a crime or any wrongful act is held entirely or partially at fault for the harm that befalls them.” Why is that? It’s because compared to a robbery, the victim is more to their assaulter.

Title IX Political Cartoon Analysis

Here are some other reasons why people disbelieve survivors (Whiting, 2019):

  1. The Myth of the Evil Perpetrator
  2. Wishing the World Was Safe
  3. The Wrong Kind of Victim
  4. Confusion and Self-Blame

The Myth of the Evil Perpetrator

This is guy that everyone understates. Why? One could be his socioeconomic status…meaning he’s rich….he’s successful. He has an outstanding reputation…the guy that everyone loves…the guy everyone knows and trusts. He’s the “nice guy” and this “nice guy” is either good looking or they are someone you’d even trust your children with.They’d never do such heinous things.


Larry Nassar, the now disgraced USA Gymnastics national team doctor and osteopathic physician for Michigan State University, was someone who well-known for being generous, selfless, and committed. He was known for his goofy charm and steadfast service, that when the young girls tried to report his actions , their cries were often ignored. And it didn’t help either since he was known for “women’s pelvic issues” which was helpful for common injuries that were faced in gymnastics, he would rebuke the girl’s cries of his sexual advances by saying they misunderstood his “technique”.

Wishing the World Was Safe

I guess for some people ignorance really is bliss for some people while still having this “I could have seen it a mile a way” attitude. Well, of course they could. If after I’ve heard someone story without having being in the situation myself,  of course, I would have seen it coming. Researchers call this the “hindsight effect.” In one study, research participants read different versions of a story. One group of participant read a version where a character was raped at the end, while the other group head the netural ending. The first group displayed a bias toward their character after picking up on clues from the story hence leading towards the “I knew it all along” bias where the listening audience  may make the situation being told them “predictable” or “easy” when really…. it wasn’t.


In Mississippi, a woman was raped on a Biloxi Bay Bridge when she went out running. Even though she reported the assault and was treated and tested local hospital, people still had something to say about the incident: “I would not run alone that late at night, especially being a woman. Go during daylight or with a running buddy” and “It’s dark at  6 p.m. what was was she even doing alone walking on the bridge?”

The Wrong Kind of Victim

Or what is called, “ideal victim” is where the victim must fit these five characteristics:

  1. Weak/vulnerable
  2. Involved in a respectable activity at the time of victimization
  3. Blameless in all aspects of the interaction
  4. Victimized by an obvious offender
  5.  Someone who does not know the offender

Example: If a person fights back, is not dressing in the right way, is intoxicated or if the accused is someone they know, their story is more likely to be questioned or doubted

4. Confusion and Self-Blame

Here the victim may either accept that the blame their perpetrator is placing on them or feel a deep shame for allowing the abuse to keep happening or for being at the wrong place or for not getting away.


One of Larry Nassar’s early victims, Larissa Boyce, while trusting in her coach who found her claim upsetting, then was told by her coach, that if she reported about the incident it would have “very serious consequences” for both Nassar and herself. Terrified at this possibility, Larissa end up eventually crying and apologizing to Nassar, saying it was a “misunderstanding and all her fault”.

So, how can people  know what sexual assault is? Educate themselves. It’s as School House Rocky says, because:

Image result for schoolhouse rock knowledge is power gif
Sorry had to put a lighthearted gif, to such a tough topic. And I don’t know about you, but Schoolhouse Rock always put a smile on my face 😀

Alright, so what sites could help people better under sexual assault? Take a look at the sites below:

No More


Planned Parenthood


Reach Out (Australia)

The Survivors Trust (UK)

Victims Connect

Victims of Crime

Victims Support (UK)

1 in 6

If you live outside of the U.S. and know of any anti-sexual assault organiation in your nation, if you can message me, so I can put in this post. Thank you!


“How Denial and Victim Blaming Keep Sexual Assault Hidden”. (2019). Retrieved from

Victim Blaming. (n.d.) Retrieved from

More Readings

Amber Heard: I Spoke Up Against Sexual Violence and Faced Our Culture’s Wrath

Ex-Baylor Frat President Indicted On 4 Counts of Sexual Assault Won’t Go To Prison

The Veil of Silence is Lifted for Black Women Thanks to R. Kelly Docuseries

The Hearing That Forced The World To Listen To Larry Nassar’s Survivors

Why Do Sexual Assault Victims Wait So Long To Speak Out? Take A Look At The Comments Section

Spring Fever

Yeah, it’s like the title says. Because if the crazy rain in So Cal, trees and flowers, especially in the neighborhood I live at, there was pollination EVERYWHERE. So I had mad allergies and worse…migraines. I had stop writing part 6 of my R.Kelly piece (and I was kinda getting traumatized as I was writing ALL the pieces). So to those who sent me messages, I apologize for not responding sooner for those who have sent me messages or who have been sending posts. I will respond quickly and read posts again!😄

Vincent D’Onofrio

Vincent D’Onofrio

Sometimes when we see celebs, we think they are perfect in every way, based on our own imperfect lives. But you know something? They are human beings just like us. Human beings that happen to be lucky to be the celebrities, actors, and musicians they are.

While I’ve know about this fact, it’s still surreal. Well…not as surreal as getting a tweet from Vincent D’Onofrio!

Now if you don’t know who Vincent D’Onofrio is, he’s known for playing, Leonard “Gomer Pyle” Lawrence in Full Metal Jacket, Robert Goren in Law & Order: Criminal Intent, Edgar the Bug in Men In Black, Vic Hoskins in Jurassic World and as of recently, Wilson Fisk/Kingpin in Daredevil.

Wilson Fisk/Kingpin
Robert Goren
Edgar the Bug

But little did you know, he is dyslexic. In case you don’t know what dyslexia is, in a general sense, dyslexia is a disorder that involves difficulty in learning to read or interpret words, letter, or other symbols, but it does not mean they are by any means dumb. If you want to have an idea what that looks like take a look at image below:

Now being an educator, I found this really inspiring because I have met kids who do have some sort of learning/reading disability. And a lot of them beat themselves up for it. It’s heartbreaking, but…once I help find ways to help them learn, they do well. I just fear when they are no longer with me, they may go back struggling because they like the fact they are able to struggle in front of me, without the fear I will judge or make fun of them.

So, as you see below, when Vincent D’Onofrio mentioned he had dyslexia, I couldn’t help but to ask him what he could tell me to tell my students with a learning disability:

And this is what he wrote back:

Despite the fact his grammar was off, his message was heartwarming and uplifting. I’ve shared that message with so many kids, they found it pretty inspiring as well, I mean to hear someone with an elaborate career (and great actor too) was pretty surprising and they got pumped up for their future.

So matter what your disability is–mentally or academically–you can still do great things.

Daredevil Psychology: The Devil You Know

Daredevil Psychology: The Devil You Know

Source: ScreenGeek

Dr. Travis Langley who wrote the well renown book of his Pop Culture Psychology series, “ Batman and Psychology: A Dark and  Stormy Knight” has released his 9th book from the series, “Daredevil Psychology: The Devil You Know”. “Daredevil Psychology” is comprised of writings from psychologists and other specialists of behavioral/cognitive health (including Dr. Langley himself) and they incorporate their knowledge to better understand the world of the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. One of the co-writers who you might recognize in the book is Dr. Janina Scarlet of Superhero Therapy. The book use various sources of Daredevil—film, like the one featuring Ben Affleck, comics and the recent TV series on Netflix—to have a better view of the “patient”.

[Charlie Cox in Netflix’s Daredevil from 2015-2018]



[Ben Affleck in 2003 Daredevil film]

The book is divided into 5 sections or topics that each go into subtopics or chapters that explain what makes Daredevil tick through his physical and mental abilities as well as interpersonal relationships.  For example the “Details” section has three chapters based on sensory skills. What makes this book a little bit more interesting than the “Batman Psychology”, is that we get to see how Daredevil/Matt Murdock how he “sees” through his souped-up senses that affect his psyche.

Daredevil #186 Source: Berkeley Place

“When [Matt] is struck with a second dose of radiation in adulthood, his senses are further amplified to dysfunctional extremes. […] Matt contracts, in essence, a rare but real condition called hyperacusis, which is an abnormally strong reaction in auditory pathways when someone is exposed to moderate-level sound. His symptoms become so severe that he sequesters himself in a sensory deprivation chamber. He pleads to Stick, the man who long ago taught him to master his abilities, to let him stay in the chamber indefinitely to escape the pain brought by his senses gone amok.”

Pgs 116-117

Daredevil #188 (1982); Source: Not A Hoax, Not A Dream!

Another beautiful thing the book does is that it explains the mental techniques used in Daredevil and show how it would look like in the real world. Continuing from page 117, the book goes on explaining how Matt over comes this hyperacusis:

Stick is known for his tough-love approach to mentoring. Accordingly, he taunts Matt and orders him to leave the tank. Interestingly, Stick is following a real-life protocol for treating hyperacusis. Those with the condition actually need rich sound environments. They need to abandon any ear protection (muffs, plugs, etc.) because it causes an increase in the sensitivity of the auditory system as a result of decreased input.”

Pg 117


Image result for jack murdock
Source: Haven’s Avengers Assembled
Image result for jack murdock
John Patrick Hayden as Jack “Battlin'” Murdock on Netflix’s Daredevil

The book also explains how relationships, both past and present, have (like anyone else) shaped his character as both the lawyer and the daredeviled vigilante:

Jack is inconsistent in the ways he relates to his son, sometimes forcing him to play the role of partner, at other times a confidant or friend, and at others, a child or son. Particularly in the parent/child dynamic, diffuse boundaries can have damaging consequences. As an adult, Matt struggles with his history of diffuse boundaries and conflicting roles, unintentionally re-creating them in his new relationships with family members of choice. This is perhaps most evident in his relationship with Foggy Nelson, whom he treats as best friend, partner, kid brother, and taskmaster. Eventually Foggy finds these chaotic roles unsustainable and therefore leaves Matt, sometimes as law partner and sometimes as a friend.

Pgs 66-68

Lastly, “Daredevil Psychology” is also an interactive book, which uses examples to better understand the Red vigilante. For instance, through the use of a genogram, to show a graphic example of how Matt and his relationships affect one other through its role, rules and boundaries.  This helped to better explain the discussion in chapter 6 titled, “Nelson & Murdock: It’s All In The Family.”

Image result for daredevil psychology the devil you know

“Daredevil Psychology” is a wonderful book that treats its readers like its esteemed colleagues. Informative and insightful as well as entertaining it brings light into the dark world of Daredevil. It is not a book to be missed!

You Can Find it in:

Sterling Publishing

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Or wherever books are sold



Dr. Travis Langley: Creator of the Psychgeek Books Series

Dr. Travis Langley: Creator of the Psychgeek Books Series

I’m SOOO excited! I got to be featured on a website! This was due because I wrote a little post about one of the books I’ve read: “Batman and Psychology”. (see “Psychgeek Books Series” post). My comment was featured on Dr. Travis Langley’s page, as shown below:

So who IS Dr. Travis Langley? Dr. Travis Langley is the editor and lead writer for the Popular Culture Psychology series from Sterling Publishing.

Since the release of his first acclaimed book, “Batman & Psychology: A Dark & Story Night”, he has launched a number of books that have used the world of pop culture to shed light and insight in the world of psychology. Now, he is the editor of the book series, where he along with other psychologists and other professionals of mental/behavioral health put their expertise in the various books (as well as their love of pop culture):

  • The Walking Dead Psychology: Psych of the Living Dead
  • Star Wars Psychology: Dark Side of the Mind
  • Captain America vs. Iron Man: Freedom, Security, Psychology
  • Game of Thrones Psychology: The Mind is Dark and Full of Terrors
  • Doctor Who Psychology: A Madman with a Box
  • Star Trek Psychology: The Mental Frontier
  • Supernatural Psychology: Roads Less Traveled
  • Wonder Woman Psychology: Lassoing the Truth
  • Supernatural Psychology: Roads Less Traveled

And as of recently, “Daredevil Psychology: The Devil You Know” and  “Westworld Psychology: Violent Delights”.

Dr. Langley received his B.A. in psychology from Hendrix College and his MS and Ph.D in psychology from Tulane University. In addition to being editor of the distinguished book series he teaches on crime, social behavior, mental illness and media.

If you would like to know more about Dr. Langley, click on the following webpages below:

Dr. Travis Langley (Facebook)

Popular Culture Psychology Series- PsychGeek (Facebook)

Travis Langley

Travis Langley (Amazon)


and buy his books too anywhere books are sold


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