New Job

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! I got a new job! I got offered the job yesterday during the interview. It’s for a learning center teaching job (I wanna say it’s more of tutoring job) where I will be able to perform duties such as:

  • Preparing for each instructional session; Gathers and prepares materials as appropriate
  • Evaluating and recording the progress of each student on their program assignment
  • Managing students, tasks and time to create a balanced and robust instructional session

It starts at $12, but that’s fine, because at least I will be able to practice my teaching skills. But what’s even better is that I got this job before the school year ended this week. I was so worried because I was afraid I wasn’t going to get a job before the end of this month. I feared of being homeless again. I didn’t want to relieve what I went through last year living in my car especially during the upcoming summer months (it’s already hot right now, but it’s going to get worse). I don’t want to roaming to place to place looking for places to park my car.

I’ve been putting in applications since January of this and NONE of the jobs contacted me for an interview. I was wondering what did I put or put down for me not to be employable? I mean…I have 7 years of customers service skills under my belt. Yes it’s been AWHILE since I’ve worked at such jobs, but it’s not hard to do. Anyways, a couple weeks ago, I got called for an interview for another job I wanted, but I didn’t get it (which is fine because it was only for the summer).

Let me tell you… the thought of NOT getting that job, the ONLY job which contacted me for an interview was heartbreaking. I couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat, the fear of my landlady kicking me out of my room haunted my thoughts. And like it wasn’t bad enough, I gained weight (due to stress; not eating)! I was bloated! When I’m anxious/stressed I tend to develop a lot of gas, most of it going to my stomach, making me look (as students have told me) pregnant. But after I received the good news of getting interviewed at the job I have now and getting hired on the spot…I let out a BIG burp! In fact, I gave TWO big burps. I was THAT stressed out and I could’ve sworn my stomach got smaller after that.

I got my needs met which was to be financially stable. Without that, my anxiety disorder and depressive disorder will worsen. But now it looks like I can take a breather (for now) and just focus on the upcoming training I’ll be able to partake in. Finally…I’ll be able to sleep with a peace of mind.

5 Things You Can Do to Help Your Child with Depression | NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness

We keep hearing that depression rates are rising, especially among adolescents. If you are worried your child may be going through depression, here are a few steps to take. 
— Read on www.nami.org/Blogs/NAMI-Blog/December-2018/Five-Things-You-Can-Do-to-Help-Your-Child-with-Dep

Perseverance Toward Life Goals Can Fend Off Depression, Anxiety, Panic Disorders

Looking on the bright side also acts as a safeguard, according to 18-year study.
— Read on www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2019/05/goals-perseverance

Wil Wheaton’s Metaphor for Taking Antidepressants Is Spot On | The Mighty

Actor Wil Wheaton explains what it feels like when medication helps his depression.
— Read on themighty.com/2018/04/wil-wheaton-depression-medication/

Today Sucks (Update) Aka A Little Help From My Friends

Well today I’m recovered from my depression and boy am I glad. It was tough. It felt like my heart was being pulled into this dark chasm and that pulling feeling made my muscles hurt. It was bad. I took Wednesday off from work. I just couldn’t work. I hate that I couldn’t work but I had to.

Fortunately I also had friends from Celebrate Recovery that was praying for me. What’s great too is that they understood what it was like to depressed and they prayed over me too. Whether it was over text or in person they prayed over me. And I think knowing I had people to count on and they were praying over me, helped me get passed it.

Honestly in my opinion, I think depression is a spiritual thing, because it certainly isn’t of the mind. I can have all the will power in the world & it STILL will find a way to take over me. Heck I remember a psychic telling me that while I will be having good things going for me in the future, that there was this dark cloud over me. Damned depression. I feel like depression is like some sort of weighted blanket that I didn’t ask for nor wanted and it just covers itself over me. It’s horrible.

  • But yeah, it felt great to have people who cared enough about me to think about me. Sometimes when living with depression and anxiety, it’s easy to forget you have people who care about you so it’s easy to just seclude yourself from them and the rest of the world. But please, don’t forget about the people who love and care about you. But let me say this, depression is not yours to fight alone. You need help from others…people who care for you. So who ever those people are, be in contact with them and together you guys can fight that horrible disorder.