Therapy: What To Expect From Your Therapist (Especially On Your First Time)



As as of right now, I am attending three therapy sessions: Celebrate Recovery at my church, therapy at my school, and therapy outside of school. The one I am seeing is outside of school is mainly for me to deal with relationship issues and overcome my sexual assault experience and therapy in my school is mostly to deal with my anxiety and depression. Then there’s is my sessions with my psychologist at school, where I can also get more prescription on my meds, but that’s like one a month.

Yeah I have my hands full with all three of those sessions in addition to student-teaching, going to school and work. Whew! But I’m happy, because I’m able to have the help I need to get through the week. And I feel like I’m getting what I need emotionally and spirituality too, because my spirituality has helped me keep me going in spite of my mental illnesses. I’m learning about relationships through the relationships I’m developing in all those sessions, which then is helping me have a better relationship with myself as well.

So how did I happen to get such wonderful people? Well…to be honest…luck and trial and error. I’ve gone through 5 therapists and I’ve been to a previous Celebrate Recovery event at a church I use to attend, so I’ve learned what I’ve wanted and not wanted in my trials of recovery. My…how I shall I put this…last to third therapist (???) was a good at CBT and helped out a lot on that, but what I didn’t like was how he didn’t seem to take in mind how much God meant a lot to me just because he didn’t believe so much in God (even though he came from a Jewish background. Go figure.) Then if I were to bring up my relationships with guys in how they treat me, he’d kinda get offended, like I was offending him, which was weird. Sometimes, I think back on it, I wished I had switched to another therapist or at least got a female therapist instead.

If you’ve been in an awkward situation with a therapist that doesn’t mean you have to stop going to therapy, but rather change your therapist. I know the change is inconvenient because perhaps your current therapist was better than your previous therapist or it took you forever ever to find the most “decent” therapist. So how do you know if a therapist is right for you? How do you know if they are crossing the line (although that’s what  you do in therapy basically)? These are the things I did not like from my previous therapists:

  • Not Being Sensitive to my beliefs or Background
  • Checking the clock too much
  • Imposing religious, spiritual, political or social beliefs—In this case it was more of social beliefs; not believing in monogamous relationships, recommending me to a dating website (that ended up leading me to my assaulter) when perhaps, as much as I wanted, wasn’t ready to be in a relationship yet.
  • Not understanding what I want—When I was an undergrad, I told my therapist I felt something was wrong with me, but he didn’t seem think anything was wrong. Yeah he looked as the DSM 4 (yeah, that was a while ago), but he didn’t give me any tests that suggested I may have had a major depressive disorder and general anxiety disorder. I didn’t get diagnosed with those by another mental health professional–this time a psychiatrist—several years later. This would have saved me a lot of time.

My two new therapists have really helped me out a lot, perhaps in more ways than my previous therapists have. They are pretty much the opposite of the previous therapists… well maybe my third to last therapist did challenge me and did help me learn as well, but what I did appreciate from my latest therapists is that they showed acceptance and compassion. It helps that they don’t just see me as a patient or a patient that they’re using for their counseling degree (most of the therapists I’ve seen are at schools), but as a person too and it helps me (indirectly) learn how good relationships form. So if you don’t have a good relationship with a therapist, then like any other person in your life, you can always leave.

Below are some links that can give you advice on the good traits and bad traits of a therapist whether you meet them in person, online, over the phone  or through text. I hope these articles will prove most helpful for you! At least it will save you more time. I had to learn the hard and long way!

4 Steps to Finding the Right Therapist for You and Your Anxiety

25 Signs of a Bad Therapist: You Deserve Better

Here’s What Makes a Good Therapist: 17 Signs to Look For

How Do I Know If My Therapist Is Effective?


Migraine: The Signs

Okay, so I went to see my therapist today (it’s a new additional one, but I’ll explain later) and I told her about migraine and she DID say it was attributed stress. Well…she said it was a stress headache, but I know it’s not because a headache has never made me sensitive to light (it’s making hard for me to do my homework and readings on my laptop), make me dizzy, move one side of my head to another and sometimes linger around my eye area. Even to the part I have sinus pressure, when flu season is already over…at least for me. But man…it’s last me nearly 3 weeks, even with migraine medicine. I had to stop my rideshare job this afternoon, because of the bright lights and dizziness. So there goes my money making hours….

Okay so how do YOU know what a migraine is? Well found some handy info graphs that will hope you understand and recognize better if you haven’t already.

Superhero Therapy: The Psychology of Harry Potter

Every now and then I like to listen to uplifting, educational and/or entertaining podcasts. So let me share one I listen to—Assembly of Geeks. Well, mostly their segment, “Superhero Therapy”. Sound familiar? If not, it is coined by, Dr. Janina Scarlet author of “Superhero Therapy” and “Harry Potter Therapy”. She just started her segment last year on the Podcast, with one of the first topics on Harry Potter. I encourage you to check out the Geek Podcast. Dr. Scarlet’s segment there is very informative especially on how she ties in mental health with popular tv shows and movies like, “Stranger Things” and “Star Wars”. I promise you won’t be disappointed!


Psychgeek Book Series

When I first read saw the “Batman: Psychology: A Dark and Stormy Knight”, I thought to myself, “Really??? I like Batman and all, but to do some sort psych evaluation on the the characters of the Batman series. C’ mon.” But guess what I did. And you know what? It’s a very good read.

Although I’m still reading the series, “Batman Psychology” is a very entertaining read, while informing the reader the exact science of psychology. And guess what? There are 10 books  from the Psychgeek series that use pop culture to discuss the dynamics of human nature, its psyche, and how life events can affect it.

These books include as shown:

Star Wars: Dark Side of the Mind

Game of Thrones Psychology: The Mind is Dark and Full of Terrors

Daredevil Psychology: The Devil You Know

Supernatural Psychology: Roads Less Traveled

Dr. Who Psychology: Mad Man With a Box

Star Trek Psychology: The Mental Frontier

Wonder Woman Psychology: Lassoing The Truth

Captain America VS Iron Man: Freedom, Security, and Psychology

The Walking Dead: Psych of the Living Dead

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If you like to purchase these books, please purchase them via this link. Proceeds go to this website.


Mental Health On Books (Update)

Unfortunately, I found my amazon link on mental health books on the left border side of my blog has not been working, so I replaced it with my link to Barnes and Nobel. In the future, I’m hoping to update my blog and add for instance, videos on mental health and through your purchase(s) with the links on the following books it can be a possibility! So without further ado, here are books I recommend for you to read.  These books are fun, entertaining, but most importantly educational:

A First-Rate Madness: Uncovering the Links between Leadership and Mental Illness

Anxious in Love: How to Manage Your Anxiety, Reduce Conflict, and Reconnect with Your Partner

Batman and Psychology: A Dark and Stormy Knight

Family Don't End with Blood: Cast and Fans on How Supernatural Has Changed Lives

Harry Potter Therapy: An Unauthorized Self-Help Book from the Restricted Section

It's Not Your Journey

Superhero Therapy: Mindfulness Skills to Help Teens and Young Adults Deal with Anxiety, Depression, and Trauma

Supernatural Psychology: Roads Less Traveled


Harry Potter Therapy

Like Harry Potter? Dealing with emotional issues? Would you LIKE to better understand mental/emotional health (topics both either overunderestimately or underestimately understood)Why not have both? “Harry Potter Therapy: An Unauthorized Self-Help Book from the Restricted Section” by Dr. Janina Scarlet delves not into the World of Harry Potter, but uses the characters and scenarios from the series to not only entertain but to help you learn how better manage your mental/emotional health. I have read her first book, “Superhero Therapy” and being someone who is familiar with such topics of mental health, she is really good at using the essence of superhero characters and villains to depict mental and emotional health concerns and issues. So, if you’d like to check out her work, especially on how she uses the world of Harry Potter to better conceptualize mental/emotional health, click the link below and you can download her book for free! Yes! I said it free. How do I know? ‘cause I also listen to her “Superhero Therapy” segment on the “Assembly of the Geeks” podcast. Which is also really good! So give it a chance I think you might like it, ESPECIALLY if you’re into Harry Potter like me!

Below is the link for the website and the download. You can download as a PDF, on your kindle or on any ebook.

Harry Potter Therapy

If you like to purchase this book, please it via this link. Proceeds go to this website.


Suicide Awareness Month: Nigeria Suicide Hotlines

For my people back at home, this is for you.